Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
