now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize