On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.