yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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