Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
