i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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