Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize