I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I smell stomach acid.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
