I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
