i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize