champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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