you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
