Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
he wants to bone in the snuggie
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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