he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
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