I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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