awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
