i wish starbucks made bloody marys
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
There's a naked man in my car right now.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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