have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize