it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
