what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
