In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
