I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
