i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
that's an acceptable place to lick
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize