I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Randomize
