Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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