are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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