So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Randomize
