I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
