It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize
