): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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