Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
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