Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
