your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
