I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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