I just saw a hot homeless man
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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