peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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