dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
