I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
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sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
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didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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