You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
