Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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