Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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