do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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