we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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