I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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