The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
