Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Randomize
