I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize