Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize