when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
We have started to decorate penises.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
