ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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