Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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