at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
handjob tips. give me some.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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