The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
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But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
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tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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